{"product_id":"unisex-softstyle-t-shirt","title":"The Odyssey — Funny Parody T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Odyssey\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor thousands of years, mankind has told stories of heroic journeys. Odysseus sailed the wine-dark sea. Explorers crossed continents. Brave souls ventured into the unknown.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd then somebody had to take six kids to Applebee’s.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Odyssey\u003c\/strong\u003e celebrates the mighty minivan: a vessel of courage, cupholders, sliding doors, and a suspicious amount of crushed Goldfish crackers hiding between the seats.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIs it fast? That’s not the point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIs it glamorous? Please stop asking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCan it transport an entire youth soccer team, three folding chairs, a cooler, and one child who suddenly remembered they need poster board for school tomorrow?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAbsolutely.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for people who appreciate:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGreek mythology, but with better air conditioning\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe raw horsepower of responsible adulthood\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSliding doors that open with the push of a button\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eReturning to your wife after a seemingly 20-year journey to Costco\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eVehicles built to withstand both monsters and juice-box spills\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eWearing a minivan on a shirt like it’s a Ferrari\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome men chase glory.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome men chase destiny.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome men are circling the parking lot because somebody forgot their water bottle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Odyssey.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe journey is long. The cargo area is surprisingly spacious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDisclaimer\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e- Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMade with 100% ring-spun cotton, the Gildan 64000 from the Gildan Softstyle® collection is a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz\/yd² (153 g\/m²)) that feels blissful to wear all year round. \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal. \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAll shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort. \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMade using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThis blank tee is certified by OEKO-TEX® STANDARD 100 (Certificate No. 168252, OETI - Institut fuer Oekologie) for safety and quality assurance.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey and Antique colors - 90% cotton, 10% polyester, Graphite Heather - 50% ring-spun cotton, 50% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 64000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Bangladesh\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors , Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Light Blue \/ S","offer_id":52497375854872,"sku":"90718519991486982403","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":52497375887640,"sku":"16677125748275368159","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":52497375920408,"sku":"12498194741460258802","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ S","offer_id":52497375953176,"sku":"50900288296691892857","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ M","offer_id":52497375985944,"sku":"12494770190078726184","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":52497376018712,"sku":"63174133505082959877","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ M","offer_id":52497376051480,"sku":"44319983552416839028","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ M","offer_id":52497376084248,"sku":"33141590029955650964","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ L","offer_id":52497376117016,"sku":"13591573449522912673","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":52497376149784,"sku":"46645310807620949418","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ L","offer_id":52497376182552,"sku":"16345143291137499020","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ L","offer_id":52497376215320,"sku":"52844740733380077967","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ XL","offer_id":52497376248088,"sku":"15723580489404114666","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":52497376280856,"sku":"34252198191966177239","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ XL","offer_id":52497376313624,"sku":"71062126744717483880","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":52497376346392,"sku":"21667102473396244616","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":52497376379160,"sku":"31131593485218188799","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":52497376411928,"sku":"10030321497758442318","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":52497376444696,"sku":"13123048828217725317","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":52497376477464,"sku":"26344742732463795030","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0997\/7246\/5432\/files\/3345474940699247375_2048.jpg?v=1787606372","url":"https:\/\/nopantsdance.com\/products\/unisex-softstyle-t-shirt","provider":"No Pants Dance Print Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}